Friday, February 16, 2007
Wednesday, February 14, 2007
I Sing
I started this post a month ago, forgot about it, decided to write a post about how much I sing to Emelia, and discovered that I'd already thought of the idea. Says something about both my mind, and how pervasive a subject this one is.
Everyone has different ways to soothe a baby, and chief among mine is singing. I rarely sing children's songs, in part because I don't remember most of them. Instead, I sing whatever tune pops through my head, and given my interest in music over the years, that can be almost anything. Indeed, one of the more frightening aspects of my free-association singing is that some of the time it's music that I don't particularly like. All the same, I rarely keep the lyrics from the original intact, instead automatically coming up with my own lyrics and rhymes. I do this partly because I'm silly, and partly because I have poor recall when it comes to lyrics.
Exhibit A: Cecilia by Simon & Garfunkel has become Emelia when I sing, usually at times when she's crying or won't go to sleep. "Emelia, you're breaking my heart, You're shaking my confidence baby. Oh Emelia, I'm down on my knees, I'm begging you please, go to sleep (or please stop crying). Woe woe woe."
Exhibit B: In the wake of Emelia's tendency to suck on her hands, I've taken "If I Had a Hammer" and turned it into the following:
But here's the thing: I sing to her constantly -- good tunes, bad rhymes, nonsense -- it doesn't matter, but I keep on singing. Now that I'm going to be at home alone with her, I worry that I'll forget how to speak without singing, sort of a very bad version of the Buffy musical (that's right -- singing until one spontaneously combusts is considered the less bad option). As frightening a prospect that it might be, at least Emelia generally enjoys my singing (for now). Whether I'm able to stop before she gets sick of it is another question entirely.
Everyone has different ways to soothe a baby, and chief among mine is singing. I rarely sing children's songs, in part because I don't remember most of them. Instead, I sing whatever tune pops through my head, and given my interest in music over the years, that can be almost anything. Indeed, one of the more frightening aspects of my free-association singing is that some of the time it's music that I don't particularly like. All the same, I rarely keep the lyrics from the original intact, instead automatically coming up with my own lyrics and rhymes. I do this partly because I'm silly, and partly because I have poor recall when it comes to lyrics.
Exhibit A: Cecilia by Simon & Garfunkel has become Emelia when I sing, usually at times when she's crying or won't go to sleep. "Emelia, you're breaking my heart, You're shaking my confidence baby. Oh Emelia, I'm down on my knees, I'm begging you please, go to sleep (or please stop crying). Woe woe woe."
Exhibit B: In the wake of Emelia's tendency to suck on her hands, I've taken "If I Had a Hammer" and turned it into the following:
- If I was feeling hungry,
I'd grab some green peppers,
I'd grab some onions,
Add them to two hands.
I'd take a big bun,
And some pro-vo-lone,
Add mustard and then I'd put it all together,
A great big sandwich of two hands.
But here's the thing: I sing to her constantly -- good tunes, bad rhymes, nonsense -- it doesn't matter, but I keep on singing. Now that I'm going to be at home alone with her, I worry that I'll forget how to speak without singing, sort of a very bad version of the Buffy musical (that's right -- singing until one spontaneously combusts is considered the less bad option). As frightening a prospect that it might be, at least Emelia generally enjoys my singing (for now). Whether I'm able to stop before she gets sick of it is another question entirely.
Tuesday, February 13, 2007
A Disturbance in the Force
Congrats to my sister Rebecca and her family on the birth of their son Luke yesterday -- sounds like everyone is doing well. Luke's older sister is three, and going through a protracted princess stage, so I figure I might as well start referring to her as Princess Leynie. And they have two dogs, one of whom is named Wookie. But I'm not going there, and you shouldn't either.
Monday, February 12, 2007
SAHDism for Beginners
The silence has been deafening, to everyone else -- I received a bunch of concerned calls and e-mails from people asking if everything was ok. Truthfully, most of those calls were from my folks. And the answer is that yes, I have survived my first week staying at home with Emelia. Here's a brief recap --
Monday: Kathy leaves us around 8:30, and she's at least as stressed as I am. No tears, however, and she's out the door. I have Emelia for a little while before she sacks out. Our plan to head to Kathy's work for lunch is spoiled by the cold weather (which was the issue for the entire week), but Kathy comes home for lunch. There were long periods of time that I have no idea how to fill with her, but I sing and carry, play and read. I never do feed her, because Kathy's lunchtime appearance provides ample sustenance.
Tuesday: After Kathy complains that she can't continue with the lack of sleep during the night and working all day, I take matters into my own hands and decide to try again with getting her to sleep on her own. After two hours in the morning, she goes to sleep (I went in every 10 minutes or so in an attempt to provide comfort). Kathy comes home for lunch again, feeds her, and after she leaves, I go through the putting her to sleep routine again -- this time it only takes 45 minutes. I'm not sure which of us is more miserable during the process. I feed Emelia only one bottle during the day, and she takes it with no problem. I'm still at a loss with what to do to occupy the time when we're alone together.
Wednesday: We continue the efforts to get her to sleep alone. Again it takes two hours in the morning, but only fifteen minutes in the afternoon. Kathy has a 1pm conference call, so she can't come home for lunch, so it's just Emelia and I for the entire day. Damn the weather stinks. But feeding her takes a good chunk of the day, and there's something wonderful about her looking into your eyes while she's eating. Of course she only does this about 10 percent of the time, as the rest of the time is spent moving around to look at ceiling fans or anything else that catches her fancy, or focusing on the bottle. She's trying to grip the bottle, though often she'll just hold onto my fingers that are holding it. It's quite a challenge to hold it still while she's hitting it or digging her fingernails into my already winter-dried skin.
Thursday: She's in good spirits for most of the day -- she doesn't begrudge me my efforts to get her to sleep on her own. Fifteen minutes in the morning, an hour in the afternoon (after Kathy nursed her at lunchtime). I learn to do things a bit differently with bottle feeding -- she keeps moving her head to look at the fan across the room better, but that means she's facing away from the bottle and me. I accommodated her on Wednesday, but after a day of that decide it's better that she have to turn to the bottle rather than vice-versa.
Friday: She sleeps quickly when I put her down for a nap, no more than 20 minutes in the afternoon (she sleeps until 10:30 so there isn't a morning nap) -- it's not that she's now in the habit of sleeping when she's put in the crib by any means (as Thursday night attested). What it means is that I'm getting a little better at judging when to put her down. Kathy again joins us for lunch, and all of us wish she had more time to spend.
Monday: And now it's the second week, and things start rather differently. She awakes at 9:20 and I can't get her to take a bottle. So rather than wait, I bundle her up and we take our first trip alone together, to the supermarket. She's pretty well behaved for most of it, though she does start to fuss at the checkout. When we return I have to make the judgment call -- leave her in the house or the car while I get the groceries in? I opt for the car, figuring she's all secure in the child seat. I get her to take the bottle once the groceries are put away, but she doesn't drink much. The weather's nice, so finally we're able to go to Kathy's office for lunch (it's ~1.25 miles away) -- Emelia falls asleep within five minutes of heading out, but she awakes when we carry her upstairs to Kathy's office. We get more time to spend with Kathy since she doesn't use up her time traveling -- Emelia eats, we eat, the co-workers coo, and then Emelia and I head out. Within one minute she's asleep, and stays that way on the walk back home, when I bring the stroller up the steps into the house, and for the rest of the afternoon. In fact she doesn't wake up until just before 6, i.e., moments before Kathy gets home. And so I get the first nap of my paternity leave (though it's much shorter than Emelia's), and when I awake I learn that my nap is a good thing.
Monday: Kathy leaves us around 8:30, and she's at least as stressed as I am. No tears, however, and she's out the door. I have Emelia for a little while before she sacks out. Our plan to head to Kathy's work for lunch is spoiled by the cold weather (which was the issue for the entire week), but Kathy comes home for lunch. There were long periods of time that I have no idea how to fill with her, but I sing and carry, play and read. I never do feed her, because Kathy's lunchtime appearance provides ample sustenance.
Tuesday: After Kathy complains that she can't continue with the lack of sleep during the night and working all day, I take matters into my own hands and decide to try again with getting her to sleep on her own. After two hours in the morning, she goes to sleep (I went in every 10 minutes or so in an attempt to provide comfort). Kathy comes home for lunch again, feeds her, and after she leaves, I go through the putting her to sleep routine again -- this time it only takes 45 minutes. I'm not sure which of us is more miserable during the process. I feed Emelia only one bottle during the day, and she takes it with no problem. I'm still at a loss with what to do to occupy the time when we're alone together.
Wednesday: We continue the efforts to get her to sleep alone. Again it takes two hours in the morning, but only fifteen minutes in the afternoon. Kathy has a 1pm conference call, so she can't come home for lunch, so it's just Emelia and I for the entire day. Damn the weather stinks. But feeding her takes a good chunk of the day, and there's something wonderful about her looking into your eyes while she's eating. Of course she only does this about 10 percent of the time, as the rest of the time is spent moving around to look at ceiling fans or anything else that catches her fancy, or focusing on the bottle. She's trying to grip the bottle, though often she'll just hold onto my fingers that are holding it. It's quite a challenge to hold it still while she's hitting it or digging her fingernails into my already winter-dried skin.
Thursday: She's in good spirits for most of the day -- she doesn't begrudge me my efforts to get her to sleep on her own. Fifteen minutes in the morning, an hour in the afternoon (after Kathy nursed her at lunchtime). I learn to do things a bit differently with bottle feeding -- she keeps moving her head to look at the fan across the room better, but that means she's facing away from the bottle and me. I accommodated her on Wednesday, but after a day of that decide it's better that she have to turn to the bottle rather than vice-versa.
Friday: She sleeps quickly when I put her down for a nap, no more than 20 minutes in the afternoon (she sleeps until 10:30 so there isn't a morning nap) -- it's not that she's now in the habit of sleeping when she's put in the crib by any means (as Thursday night attested). What it means is that I'm getting a little better at judging when to put her down. Kathy again joins us for lunch, and all of us wish she had more time to spend.
Monday: And now it's the second week, and things start rather differently. She awakes at 9:20 and I can't get her to take a bottle. So rather than wait, I bundle her up and we take our first trip alone together, to the supermarket. She's pretty well behaved for most of it, though she does start to fuss at the checkout. When we return I have to make the judgment call -- leave her in the house or the car while I get the groceries in? I opt for the car, figuring she's all secure in the child seat. I get her to take the bottle once the groceries are put away, but she doesn't drink much. The weather's nice, so finally we're able to go to Kathy's office for lunch (it's ~1.25 miles away) -- Emelia falls asleep within five minutes of heading out, but she awakes when we carry her upstairs to Kathy's office. We get more time to spend with Kathy since she doesn't use up her time traveling -- Emelia eats, we eat, the co-workers coo, and then Emelia and I head out. Within one minute she's asleep, and stays that way on the walk back home, when I bring the stroller up the steps into the house, and for the rest of the afternoon. In fact she doesn't wake up until just before 6, i.e., moments before Kathy gets home. And so I get the first nap of my paternity leave (though it's much shorter than Emelia's), and when I awake I learn that my nap is a good thing.
Thursday, February 01, 2007
In Four Days I'll Be a SAHD
It's hard to believe that Emelia is over 12 weeks old now -- I've got to stop thinking of her age in terms of weeks, and move onto months. Emelia has taken a keen interest in the world, checking everything out. Kathy's nursing is frequently interrupted by Emelia going off the nipple to take a peek at everything around her, just taking it all in. And sleep is hard to come by, because the world is so new she doesn't want to stop looking at it. She smiles and giggles all the time, and seems like a very happy kid.Kathy's maternity leave is coming to an end -- on Monday she'll be back at work and I'll start my 12 weeks of paternity leave. Kathy's more than a little apprehensive about returning to work because she's gotten used to seeing Emelia all the time -- if Emelia ever gets on a schedule, there'll only be an hour or so in the morning and a couple of hours in the evening. There'll also be lunchtimes, because I'll be bringing Emelia by several times a week for that (Kathy's office is just over a mile away). And I'm a little apprehensive myself -- I haven't spent all day alone with her yet, and I'm not sure how I'll be able to entertain and stimulate her all day every day. I'm sure I'll be able to pull it off, but those first few days, while Emelia is stressing about not seeing her mother and I'm developing routines, is going to be quite challenging.
Friday, January 12, 2007
The Wonderkid
Emelia is so wonderful that people have begun paying to see her. How else to explain that a friend treated Kathy and me to a lovely dinner tonight, while she and her husband babysat? I mean, other than the possibility that the friend is awesome?!
--
We head to the Outer Banks for a week starting tomorrow, so don't expect much posting in the immediate future.
--
We head to the Outer Banks for a week starting tomorrow, so don't expect much posting in the immediate future.
Thursday, January 11, 2007
12 Things to do Before I Die
In the realm of firsts, this past year I obviously became a father for the first time, but I also grew a beard and skydived (skydove?). All told, 2006 was an impressive year of firsts. But never mind what I've already done -- what are some of the things left for me to do?
1. Visit all seven continents (so far, visited N. America, Europe, Asia)
2. Dip my toes in all four oceans (so far, Atlantic and Pacific)
3. Run a marathon
4. Attend a World Cup match outside the U.S.
5. Place a wager of at least $1000
6. Live in the Country
7. Swim with dolphins
8. Attend the Kentucky Derby
9. Attend a boxing match
10. Try Absinthe
11. Render a verdict in a trial
12. Meet with my Congressman (or Congresswoman)
1. Visit all seven continents (so far, visited N. America, Europe, Asia)
2. Dip my toes in all four oceans (so far, Atlantic and Pacific)
3. Run a marathon
4. Attend a World Cup match outside the U.S.
5. Place a wager of at least $1000
6. Live in the Country
7. Swim with dolphins
8. Attend the Kentucky Derby
9. Attend a boxing match
10. Try Absinthe
11. Render a verdict in a trial
12. Meet with my Congressman (or Congresswoman)
Thursday, January 04, 2007
Pic Pain In The Patuchus
Although the picture in my last post showed up without difficulty last night, this morning it was no go. I'm not sure what the problem is, but I have to wonder if it's being blocked because the source for the photos is a "rival" site, yahoo. After all, all the links in my book reviews still show up fine, even though they're from bn.com. Regardless, I downloaded the photo from yahoo, and loaded it onto blogger, and as you can see, the photo's there now. FWIW, Kathy's trying to keep the photos of Emelia relatively current here, and if you can't remember that link, it's linked directly from the front page of her blog (which is listed here under "Blogs I Read").
Wednesday, January 03, 2007
Caution: Man with Baby
Yesterday the federal government was closed as part of the National Day of Mourning in honor of President Ford. This meant that I got one more day off before I had to go back to work. Strangely enough, however, because Kathy felt that she should attend a meeting at her office, I got my first experience of staying at home with Emelia by myself for anything more than an hour (Kathy has been away for longer, but I haven't been left alone with Emelia those times).
Kathy fed Emelia, then headed off to the meeting around 9:30. I finished my breakfast one-handed, then took Emelia upstairs and engaged her with "exercises," where I leaned her against a pillow while she tried to hold herself upright. She was smiling, giggling and babbling throughout. As soon as she started tiring of that (probably about five minutes), I walked her around for a couple of minutes before she dropped to sleep. I put her down, she awoke, I walked her some more, she fell asleep again, and this time when I put her down, she didn't wake up. I did some cleaning up while she was out, but she only stayed asleep for about 30 minutes. This time she was pretty fussy, so I tried feeding her -- she cried after a few seconds each time I tried. I wasn't sure what the problem was -- was the milk too cold, did she want the boob rather than the bottle (we haven't done very much bottle feeding), did she prefer to be held in the other arm or be supported by the Boppy? Maybe she wasn't hungry. No matter the cause, she wouldn't be appeased by feeding or any other activity. After about 40 minutes of trying whatever I could think of, I put her in her swing, and within three minutes she fell asleep. While she was out, I played on the computer for part of the time and got ready to go out the rest of the time. I found an old, small backpack of mine to serve as diaper bag -- the one Kathy had was too feminine for my tastes, and besides, it weighed a lot even when empty. Then I put some bunting into the stroller seeing as how it was a cool and windy day. Soon enough, around 12:20, it was time to go, so I got Emelia and took the 25-minute walk to Kathy's office. There, Emelia made a good impression with Kathy's boss, before Kathy, Emelia and I headed out to lunch.
Performancewise, I'd say that I did ok with my trial run -- I didn't need to call anyone for assistance, and was able to (eventually) figure things out. As for whether I enjoyed it, I really did -- I fully recognize I'm biased, but I already love this little girl a whole bunch. I at least thought about calling in sick today, just so I could spend more time with her. I expect that my performance and appreciation of being with her may change when I have her all day, every day, which I'll be doing starting in early February. I'm hopeful that between my growth in experience and Emelia's in communication, I'll be able to respond to her needs more readily then. I have no idea whether I'll love the time with her when it's just the two of us every day, but I've got a good feeling so far.
Kathy fed Emelia, then headed off to the meeting around 9:30. I finished my breakfast one-handed, then took Emelia upstairs and engaged her with "exercises," where I leaned her against a pillow while she tried to hold herself upright. She was smiling, giggling and babbling throughout. As soon as she started tiring of that (probably about five minutes), I walked her around for a couple of minutes before she dropped to sleep. I put her down, she awoke, I walked her some more, she fell asleep again, and this time when I put her down, she didn't wake up. I did some cleaning up while she was out, but she only stayed asleep for about 30 minutes. This time she was pretty fussy, so I tried feeding her -- she cried after a few seconds each time I tried. I wasn't sure what the problem was -- was the milk too cold, did she want the boob rather than the bottle (we haven't done very much bottle feeding), did she prefer to be held in the other arm or be supported by the Boppy? Maybe she wasn't hungry. No matter the cause, she wouldn't be appeased by feeding or any other activity. After about 40 minutes of trying whatever I could think of, I put her in her swing, and within three minutes she fell asleep. While she was out, I played on the computer for part of the time and got ready to go out the rest of the time. I found an old, small backpack of mine to serve as diaper bag -- the one Kathy had was too feminine for my tastes, and besides, it weighed a lot even when empty. Then I put some bunting into the stroller seeing as how it was a cool and windy day. Soon enough, around 12:20, it was time to go, so I got Emelia and took the 25-minute walk to Kathy's office. There, Emelia made a good impression with Kathy's boss, before Kathy, Emelia and I headed out to lunch.Performancewise, I'd say that I did ok with my trial run -- I didn't need to call anyone for assistance, and was able to (eventually) figure things out. As for whether I enjoyed it, I really did -- I fully recognize I'm biased, but I already love this little girl a whole bunch. I at least thought about calling in sick today, just so I could spend more time with her. I expect that my performance and appreciation of being with her may change when I have her all day, every day, which I'll be doing starting in early February. I'm hopeful that between my growth in experience and Emelia's in communication, I'll be able to respond to her needs more readily then. I have no idea whether I'll love the time with her when it's just the two of us every day, but I've got a good feeling so far.
Monday, January 01, 2007
Concerning One of Those Unstoppable Forces
Sometimes protest helps create awareness of an issue, so that, even if the protest fails once, it has an effect on future acts. That being said, I'm skeptical this group will have even such limited success.
Happy New Year!
Happy New Year!
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